Tuesday, March 2, 2010

The Almighty Dollar - (A somewhat longish post)

Planning this wedding for us, and by us I mean us ladies, us brides, because let's face it, most to-be-grooms aren't as involved in the planning process as us. For us, the planning process is so exciting and in some cases (like mine) awe- inspiring, that sometimes we get pretty carried away and not always consider the financial hole we are digging ourselves into for a lot of things that we go ga-ga over. A wedding really lasts 5-6 hours (but our marriage lasts a lifetime) and in spite of us wanting it to be the greatest day of our lives, it should still be done reasonably). Don't get me wrong, if you've got the Benjamins or your wedding is being paid for by someone else, then by all means you go girl, but I would implore you not to put yourselves in debt before you've even started your lives together.

We've been going to premarital counseling and very important subjects are addressed but financial issues are never brought up. Why is that ? I mean we're told not to go to bed angry and to share our feelings with each other etc., why not don't spend what you can't afford? Considering the high rate of divorce in this country with money (finances) being one of the stronger causes, it's such a shame to see such once great couples lives collapse. For some of us (both Mr. Muscle and I) with student loans, not assessing our financial condition would just put us further into debt which can place a serious strain on our lives. Imagine worrying about every little financial decision: what toothpaste brand is cheapest as opposed to what's better; not being able to go out occasionally to have a nice dinner; putting your baby-making plans on hold because the finances just aren't in order.

I hate to be so morbid but when I watch shows like "Rich Bride, Poor Bride", "Bridezilla" and the like, I can't help but realize how petty and spoilt and unreasonable some of those women are and no matter the cost of something and regardless of how much pleading the groom does, the more irrational these bries become. Is that all posturing for TV or are people really like that? The reason for my post is that all these blogs that I read and follow, all you lovely ladies seem to be so nice and so in love with your partners and not just the idea of the wedding, that I would hate for anyone of us to fall in this trap, myself included.

I find myself getting carried away sometimes and I'm happy to have Mr. Muscle to rein me in. And out of respect for him, I would never go over his head after we've made a decision about not spending too much. We all want our weddings to be beautiful and I know they will be. Thanks to a lot of your posts, i've been able to do so many DIY projects and save myself so much money that I know we don't have to break the bank to have an unforgettable day. Thanks ladies and keep inspiring myself and others the way you do. I just hope that I can be someones inspiration even if it's a little bit.

Please tell me what you think ladies.

TTFN (ta ta for now).


  1. Thanks for the honest post; I know how hard it can be to blog about this type of thing which is probably why I haven't yet! At the beginning of the planning process I had all these ideas in my head of things I wanted. Tons of those things are being crossed off because I know in my heart we can't afford them and it would be stupid to waste money on some of it. I'm at the point where I'm looking past the wedding day, like you said. I know we can't buy a house right after we're married. And I know we can't have kids soon either. My goal is to not go into debt with this wedding; then the first year of marriage we'll focus on rebuilding our finances so we can do those things we want. It's hard because I really WANT some of those things, but I know I don't NEED them and having a stable future is more important than some glitzy over the top wedding. Wow, sorry for the long comment! lol


Tell me what you think!